Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Just Plain Ole Stuck-------- Memories And Such
vacation, well you get the idea. Here's an outing that is unforgettable, well at least for me!!!
Me and Clem, likes to hang out sumetimes, you know, go fishin, huntin, poker playin, and the such.
Sos, when Clem gets his brand new, used fourwheeler, we just had to go try it out, but not just anywhere
mind you, we went to Roll Gully Bayou, well everone says you can't four wheel there, me and Clem's got
You see this here four wheeler is different, we decide to soup it up, yep, we are cool.
Roll Gully Bayou, looks almos like it sounds, a big ditch what rolls roud the Red river, sandy, boggy, just a
muddy mess. Who could ask for a better playground for two drunks, in a four wheeler. Isolated , way back in
the heart of Mr. Bob land, yeah buddy.
We decided to go early, sos we could fish and such too. Got ther bout 5:00am in the mornin, found a fishin
hole, fish weren't bitin, so we go four wheelin. Mud flyin fun, spinnin out, jumpin the creek openins, dodgin
trees and such, and oh yeah, suckin down the suds.
We are about twelve sheets to the wind by 8:30am, and outta beer, beer run, oh yeah. Two drunk four
wheelers, head to the truck. Shot gon, I yelled out, hell, we get stopped, I don't need no D.W.I..
Clems, alredy got enuff ,don't bother him.
Get in his truck, he's got one them what can go eny where in, you know the kind, takes a 6ft ladder to get
Clem, is not only the mail man, but a retired militatery police, too. Thinks he can do enything.
They had been putting in a new road to the gully, not much traveled yet, but a real good shortcut., feels like
you travelin in a tunnel though. The sides are about 6ft.high, piled up from the gully, kinda mean lookin. Clem
says, I bet I can jump this side bank, I start laffin, you drunk fool that there is 6ft. high of rocks and dirt, you
ain't gonna jump thet.............................crash.
Wrong thing to say to Clem I guess, tell him can't and he wants to prove it.
Any ways, we done crashed into this thing, out here, with no one around, but God, snakes, and no beer, too.
We start laffin, when we sees, fire commin out from under the hood. Seems Clem did it right good, slammed
so hard, that it knocked somethin loose, gas on sumthin hot, caught on fire. Hell, what to do, drunks, oh yeah
put out the damn fire.
Run to the river, get a five gallon bucket of that cold ass water, pour on the flames, put out the fire. POP
POP POP, SIZZLE SIZZLE, damn cracked the block, and still no beer.
Really stuck now.
Well here comes, Jimmy Ray, with his tow truck, how lucky can you be.
Jimmy, still has a grudge from years back, frog and all, you know.
Sos, he stops, when he spots us, bout a football field away. Well, we wave our hands and call out, hey
Jimmy, tow us into town.. Jimmy, yells back, no can do, gottaa call the state police. I'm on call today and
have to report my where abouts, sorry guys.
That, stoopid S.O.B., I am ready to whup some ass now, you know how I think.
He calls the state boys, they come, and don"t you know, we get this rookie, wearin his shiny new boots, and
those stoopid glasses with the mirrors lookin at ya.
He says, you boys been drinkin.
You think we woulda done sumthin this stoopid iffen we was sober!! I says.
That ole boy just startin laughin , like a bull what had found all the cows at the bottom of the hill.
Said, git in, I'll give yall a ride into town, Clem asks, can you stop on the way, sos we can get some more
He rolled laffin , guess he didn't know Clem was serious.
Jimmy Ray is fumin, he was a thinkin, we'd go to jail. I'm Thinking, posse may have to ride soon and fix his
wagon, we'll see.
Any ways, we get home, get more beer, and pass out. No tickets, no D.W.I. and have a new state boy fren
what want to go four wheelin with us next time.
I guess the lessin we learnt was, if your gonna go four wheelin, at Roll Gully, and you get there early. Bring
plenty of beer.
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