Saturday, October 10, 2009

Week One of The Hippie Hick Road Trip / Part One



Gene was contacted by some ole boys, outa Tennessee, they needed help to set up an outdoor stage, and do the roady gig, for this thing, they were a throwin. Told him it would be somethin like Wood Stock. Ever one at this time was tryin to reinvent Wood Stock. These boys owned they own land, had all the Bands signed, but needed the stage built by Memorial day. They needed all the outside sound system built and installed, and ready to go. There was only two weeks to git this done.


When I went into Genes' store, he asked me could I build a stage, for a outside concert. Well, I wasn't sure, sos I aked him whut this was all about. He splained whut was goin on, these boys in Tennessee, and all. Hell, I woulda told him, I could build the Empire State building, right then, when the biggest thing I had ever built was an ole barn. Eny ways, he was convinced and deecided, I could go and help.
We would load up a trailer with stuff from the head shop, and set up a small booth to sell this stuff, sos we could have some extra money. They, would have all the materials on the site when we got there. We would be paid when we got there, and could make more money from sellin them candles and such


These ole boys gave us directions over the phone, said it was the quickest most direct route, to git to the ole farm house site. Now these days you didn't have no gps, or google map stuff, and the maps you did git never had no updates. Hell, some of em barely had the highways marked. They told us not to bring no pot, as there would be plenty on site, and they didn't want us to git busted if we got stopped. Maybe we should of figgered sumthin was up, after thet  little talk.


We got all loaded up and headed out early Friday mornin, had the little U-Haul trailer hooked up, stuffed to the hilt. We was all excited to go and do this, man we were real members of a historic happenin. The hippie hick, the head shop owner, were on the road to success.


Gene was about five feet and five inches tall, dressed like a Hari Krishna, his head got shaved by a group of bikers, not too long ago, cause she was hangin with him at his head shop. Me, I was five feet eleven inches tall, had waist long strawberry blond hair and a red beard, then. We looked kinda strange to folks I guess, but thet was the way it was then.


We had been driven all day, and it was startin to git dark, we saw the exit thet we had to take, and got off. Now you know how us guys are, we needed to relieve the pressure that had built up in our bladder, yes, we needed to take a leak. Sos, I take the first little gravel road I come to, go down about a quarter mile, we git ou,t stretch out, and start relievin our selves.


Man, these real bright lights come on, red flashin lights outta no where, commin from both directions.Mustta been ten of them old timey cop cars, with the spot lights, and ever thin. These cops, said, whut  you boys up to, ya'll here to set up thet concert?  Not knowin whut was goin on we said yessir, an was real polite and all. Man they arrested us right then and there, told us to lean against the vehichle, spread em out. Then they patted us down, like we had uzis or sumthin. Put handcuffs on us and told us to get in thet there cop- car, then took us to this little jail house.


When we got to this jail house we asked whut we were bein arrested for. They said, for public drunkedness, we ain't had nuthin to drink. Transportation of untaxed alcohol, I only had a pint of Southern comfort. Indecent expossure, hell, weren't nuthin out there cept maybe an owl. Resistin arrest, man you gotta be kiddin, there musta been thrity cops, and were stunned, froze in our tracks.
Then they said for disturbin the peace, man, thet must've been a really loud leak we was takin.


They took my keys, took my belt, no phone call could be made till we see the court guy. Yeah, court guy he said, I was thinkin, we are in sum deep shi.. here. They put us in this cell with sbout six other guys, that had no shoes or socks on, and had little ropes for belts. One of em came up and qasked did we have a smoke he could have, he had only ine toothe and his ears was so big I started laffin. Then I gave the ole boy a smoke, he squated on the floor and smoked it like it was a joint.


We got to lookin around and all the cells were full, we saw all kind of  people here, but almost all of em had real long hair. We asked em why they were in here.They said ain't you heard? Heard what? I asked.These here people, don't want a bunch of hippies settin up no concert in these here parts. It's all on the news and ever thin, how they have deputized ever one thet wants to wear a badge, and keep all these hippies outa their county.


Man, this is gonna be a long, two days till we see a judge, or "court guy", I'm thinkin.
We make friends with some of the guys, one of em lives on a farm real close to where the concert is suppose to be. He invites us a stay at his place, after we see the "court guy" Monday and get released.Says we can camp there.


Monday, we git called to go and see the "court guy", hell, just some little skinny, Barney Fife lookin guy. I start laffin. He says order in the court, I can't stop laffin. Then says real stern like, how do you plead?


I say, plead to whut.
You charges, he said.
I said not guilty, you honerable court guy sir.
Fine is onehundered and twenty dollars he said, cool as a cucumber.
Not guilty I said.
Fine the circuit judge comes in three weeks, you can stay in jail till he comes, he said.
I got onehundered and twenty dollars in my pocket, I said.When can I git outa here.


So far we ain't been gone a week, and we're out twohundred  forty dolars for jail and fines, and another onehundred and fifty dollars for them drivin my car and trailer to the jail, then chargin a towing fee.
So what else can happen on this here trip, we head out agin tomorrow after campin out and broke now.more to follow .
Sorry about the look of this blog, computer is actin  up thank you cable company, will post the rest of the story tomorrow.

9 comments:

Dayne Gingrich said...

"Fine the circuit judge comes in three weeks, you can stay in jail till he comes, he said.
I got onehundered and twenty dollars in my pocket, I said.When can I git outa here."

FREAKIN HILARIOUS!!

Here's my $$... sorry. Tough guy, Bob! ;-)

Innocent Owner of Mad Cats said...

I think I squashed a cat while I was rollin across the floor laughing. That'll teach you to pee so loud.

plainolebob said...

Coach Dayne wait till the trip starts

Mike, you ain't heard nuthin yet

Hunter said...

Really looking forward to the rest of this one. Great story telling!

teacherwriter said...

Bob, Just wanted to drop a line (cause it's been a rough couple of days over on Google discussion board) and say thank you for being such a gentleman and a great blogger friend. Keep up the great work!

Jenno said...

That's some big ole steamin BS that they would treat my hippie brethren like that... I'm sorry they did that to you. Some people are just ignorant and don't want to learn nothin bout nobody else.

I am glad, however, that you came out still you and happy to share the story with us. :D It is kinda funny. :D

Hugs for you and my girl Bessie hehe :D

Sarah said...

uh oh...the trip was off to a bumpy start!

Cheri Pryor said...

So did Barney-Fife wanna be have one bullet?

John Silveira said...

LMAO... just catching up.. thanks for the laughs as always Bob... I needed that

We Laugh A Lot

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I Have started this blog as a rest stop to collect my thoughts, share my ideas with my friends and to start work on what ever, I started blogging at the last of august, 2009. it says 2008, hell I don't know where they got that..lol

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